Happy Dance

My day at school began with a happy dance. More happy dances happened throughout the day.

Why so many dances from someone who doesn't really dance?

-I got my updated classroom budget - which was exciting because they realized they made an oop-sies and increased my budget.

-There were new boxes in my future classroom.

-A guy came in and worked in my classroom. He installed a changing table (I'm not exactly sure why, but whatevs), my dry erase board, and my projector screen.

-A different guy came in and started putting in the supports for a swing.

-A student had an "Ah-Ha" moment in math class. We had worked on using touchmath for about 3 weeks. This student had never really understood putting dots on the numbers to use them to count. Today, I introduced using number lines to help with adding. I had to go deal with a situation, but when I came back to see how this student was doing, he had put all of the dots on the numbers for touchmath! My first reaction was "He didn't follow directions" but then I took a second look and realized "OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!! HE USED TOUCH MATH!!!!!!!!!!!" I gave him a high five and did a little happy dance... the student told me to stop dancing - people should only dance at home. :D

-The kitchen cabinets for my classroom were delivered after school!!!  And I was told that by the end of next week, I should be in my classroom.

-There was a package waiting outside my door! As I opened it, there was a lovely note from a lady from the church I grew up in. There were some encouraging quotes and Bible verses that she shared. She also sent me two rice bowls (as a tribute to my time in China) to use as ice cream bowls! (She sent 2 just in case I wanted to share my ice cream... like thats going to happen!) :)

It's been a day FULL of happy dances!

Here's to another day full of happy dances! (imagine me toasting you with my bowl full of ice cream) :)

Feeling Blessed

I've been wearing my "blessed" mudlove band any chance I get. (Admittedly, that isn't as much as I would like because I don't like to wear bracelets to school, but still...)

I was slow to jump on the fad of getting mudlove bracelets. I don't really like being like everyone else. But I've slowly grown my collection to 4 bands. My first was "abundant life". About nine months later, I got my second one saying "beloved" because that's how God refers to me, the bride of Christ. My next bracelet was to benefit The Grace College Chapter of the Council for Exceptional Children - "Micah 6:8" which says 'What does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.' 

I happened to win a free mudlove band, and chose one with "blessed" written on it to remind me to count my blessings and to help remind others of the choice to be thankful for what God has provided. 


I've had a lot of things going against me recently with some challenges at work. But still... The feeling of being "blessed" has been there. 
I'm blessed by our school secretary who has "adopted" me into part of her family. You know how much someone considers you part of the family when they serve you leftovers :) She has been a huge help and an encourager. 
I'm blessed by one of the other teachers in the school who has also helped me out at school with some of the issues and has welcomed me when I've visited the church she attends. 
I'm blessed by someone I met at church one week who gave me a map of the city and showed me some good trails to walk/bike on. 

I had a birthday this week. The simple gestures of getting cupcakes for my students to enjoy, taking me out for a DQ blizzard, taking me out for breakfast (my favorite meal of the day), making 
me a birthday cake... They all reminded me how much I am cared for. Living in a new town where I don't really know anyone can be lonely, but these simple gifts were a great reminder of how I am treasured and blessed by those around me. 

I feel so blessed by all of you, my friends and my family, and by God... Thank you for your encouragement. Thanks for helping me laugh. 

Blessed, definitely blessed. 

I. Need. Help.

Why are those 3 simple words so hard to say?

Is it because, by saying them, we admit that we aren't perfect? We're admitting that we aren't self-sufficient but that we have to rely on someone else? Is it our pride? Is it fear of what other people will think? It is fear of not being accepted by people because you need them?

Last week, I really realized how much I need help. It was a really rough week at school with some 'extreme' behaviors presenting themselves in my classroom. I got punched at, had things thrown at me, had my personal space invaded, and had to use some of my "Handle with Care" training to deflect a student's grip on me. One student took a swing at me in front of the Student Resource Officer (SRO) and was taken away from my class by him and the assistant principal. When processing the situation with an Occupational Therapist who has worked with the student, she was surprised by the student's behavior and was bothered that I used outside help. She thought I should be the disciplinarian in my classroom, not using outside help, so that the students respect me as the authority. But I didn't know what to do. Everything I tried just kept him running away from me and refusing to work. And when he would stop long enough to listen, he would get "all up in my grill", and I didn't know how to handle that situation either.

As I left school on Friday with a heavy heart, I felt the weight of shame on my shoulders. I was ashamed that I couldn't handle my students without help. That led to the feeling of incompetence.

Granted, I shouldn't be so hard on myself. I am a first year teacher who has a challenging group of students.

But, nevertheless, I have been struggling all weekend with trying to figure out how to ask for help from my boss, because I am (finally) ready to admit to myself and others that I need help to make my classroom the best learning environment possible. Tonight, I sent an email to my boss asking to meet tomorrow to discuss classroom and behavior management.


Tomorrow morning, I'll overcome my fear, pride, and shame long enough to say:

I. Need. Help.


And I'll get the help I need so very much.


Thanks for your prayers!